Lavish

I can't stop thinking about the word "Lavish".  Not because I like to go around thinking about random words, but because last spring I sensed God was trying to tell me that He loved me..... lavishly.  And since I am a slow learner, I am still chewing on this, 5 months later.   You see, I am a striver..the lie I fall into is that "I have to be perfect to be loved".  And since I am so rarely perfect (okay, since I am never perfect), I have trouble believing that God could love me lavishly.  It is easier to believe that God loves me the bare minimum or at least normally.  But not lavishly.  It just sounds too extravagant, to good to be true.

So I looked the word up on dictionary.com.  Lavish can be used as an adjective or a verb.  As an adjective, the definition is "using or giving in great amounts; prodigal".  (I love that since the Prodigal Son is one of my favorite parables).  As a verb, the definition is: "to expend or give in great amounts without limit".  

So yes, lavish love is extravagant, it sounds to good to be true...but it actually is.  Actually is true, I mean.  1 John 3:1 says: "How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God".

His love for me is not nominal, normal, rationed, or given based on how well I perform.  His love is stronger that I will ever comprehend, full of grace I will never understand, never-ending, never changing, never running out, passionate, and lavish.

Does something in your heart beat a little faster at that?  Mine does, and I know I can't even come close to accurately describing or understanding how lavish His love truly is.

In the Stillness Is the Dancing

I've been trying to be still lately. It is a completely counter-cultural idea...I feel like I get a lot of my worth by how busy I am. Like if someone asked me what I did all day and I said "Be still" they would think I am crazy...or worse yet, (gasp!) lazy.

But I think I am too busy. My mind is always racing with things I need to do, my calendar is full, my sleep is often disrupted, I even double booked myself with two precious friends last week. In short, I am on overload.

I've been thinking a lot about being still. I think God wants me to be still. "Be still and know that I am God" He said. I want a quiet heart. I want to sit at His feet and bask in His love for me. I want to deal with the deep issues that I normally gloss over and am "too busy" to deal with. I want to make what is important a priority instead of what is urgent. In short, I want to be closer to God.

So I've been still. I've been laying in our hammock in the backyard. I've been reading for hours on end, losing myself in the Bible. I've been reading poetry. I've been thinking. I've been finding enjoyment in being still.

T.S. Elliott said "in the stillness will be the dancing." I am learning the dance.